Marriage Council and Motivational Talk

  4. Replace the negativity in your surroundings. What you let into your mind in your everyday life will have big effect on you. So start questioning what you allow in. Ask yourself: What are the top 3 sources of negativity in my life? It could be people, websites, magazines, podcasts, music and so on. Then ask yourself: What can I do to spend less time with these 3 sources this week? If you can’t find ways to do that right now for all three of them then take a smaller step and focus on doing that with just one of these sources. Then spend the time you’ve freed up this week on more positive sources and people that are already in your life or that you want to explore and perhaps make a new part of it.

  3. Question the thought. One thing I like to do when a negative thought taps me on the shoulder and tries to start growing in my mind is to simply to question that thought. I ask myself: Should I take you seriously? This most often leads me to say: well, no, I honestly shouldn't. Because at that moment in time I’m tired. Or hungry. Or overworked and so negativity can try to cloud my mind. Or I am getting too focused on one small mistake or one bad day. Instead of focusing on the other 95% of my life that tends to be positive. Sometimes this question helps me to see that just because I did one small thing wrong doesn't mean that I did poorly overall. Or that this one negative thing doesn’t mean that things will get worse and stay like that for a long time. Not if I chose optimism and to take small steps forward. Basically, this question gives me a reality check and grounds me to a level-headed perspective again.

1. When you’re in what seems like a negative situation, find what’s good. If you’ve had a setback, stumbled or failed then things might look bleak and so negative thoughts may start to crop up and threaten to fill your view of this situation. To counteract that ask yourself better questions. Questions that will help you to feel better but also to learn so you can grow. Questions like: What’s one good thing about this situation? What’s one thing I can do differently the next time to likely have a better outcome? What’s one thing I can learn from this? How would my best friend support and help me in this situation?2. Reminder: people don’t care that much about what you say or do. It’s easy to fall into negative thoughts when you think about what people may say or think if you do or do not do something. And so you zap your personal power and may trap yourself in analysis paralysis. Getting stuck in your head and in thoughts like that will drag you further away from what you want and from ...

  “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” Anais Nin “Having a positive mental attitude is asking how something can be done rather than saying it can’t be done.” Bo Bennett “It’s better to be an optimist who is sometimes wrong than a pessimist who is always right.” Unknown It starts with just a thought or a feeling. Or maybe with a sentence spoken by someone else. And then it starts to drag you down. Into  feeling sorry for yourself , worried or into thinking “what’s the point of taking any action at all?” as you walk around in a funk with your own personal rain cloud above your head. Negativity that wells up inside of you or in the world around you can quickly become toxic and hold you back from living the life you want. So in this week’s post I want to share 12 tips and habits that have helped me – and still help me – to prevent and to overcome my own negative thoughts but also the negativity that’s sometimes around me.

  “Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.” – ... “You call it madness, but I call it love.” – ... “We can only learn to love by loving.” – ... “A life lived in love will never be dull.” – ... “Life is the flower for which love is the honey.” – ... “All you need is love.” – ... “True love stories never have endings.” –

  Research shows that couples who care about satisfying their partner -- and who take joy from the other person's pleasure -- are happier in the sack. This might mean having sex more often than you're used to, doing it at different times than is normal for you, or acting out your partner's sexual fantasies. And practice makes perfect: When you do things that increase the feel-good endorphins in your body -- from sex, exercise, laughing, making art, or any activity that brings you joy -- you build and beef up the response pathway that helps you feel aroused more easily. It may sound like a mood killer. But researchers at the University of Toronto found that couples who believe that hard work and effort, not finding a soulmate, is the key to a great sex life enjoyed a happier intimate relationship.